Category: Put Downs

Bob, I deeply dislike you. Honestly, it keeps me up at night.

I said I think you may not be the worst resident ever, but I can’t be sure of stuff like that. Come on, I haven’t done the appropriate leg work!

Oh my God. What happened in your life that made you so needy that you’ve got to fill every waking second by babbling on?

I was in a costume, too. I went as someone who doesn’t make a fool out of himself. How’d you not get that?

Hey, Bob. As far as the whole intro thing goes, I’ve actually gone ahead and given it a lot of thought, but I’m afraid I’m gonna very politely have to tell you to blow it out your ass.

Newbie, did you not see what just happened? Kelso is so far up my ass that I can taste Brylcreem in the back of my throat. And you, you’re…you’re third-year now. Wake up, this whole Dr. Cox Riding in to The Rescue part of the show is over.

Look, Newbie, there are times a man wants to keep something to himself. Like, say, he’s got a son. Or he’s 29-years-old and keeps a journal with a unicorn drawn on the cover.

Whoa! Bob Kelso here before noon? They’re either giving away free doughnuts at the café, or there’s an Asian prostitute convention in the I.C.U.!

The fact of the matter is, I kinda make it a rule never to get in bed with people that I have nothing but contempt for.

Oh, hey, this whole you-leaving-the-room-whenever-I-enter-it thing that you’re doing is just…I love it!