Coxisms - The Quotes of Dr Perry Cox

769

Tomek — Fri, 01 Aug 2008 18:54:54 +0000

“You have diabetes and you can’t eat cupcakes.”

768

Tomek — Fri, 01 Aug 2008 18:53:43 +0000

“Well, now, Gandhi, since you don’t grasp the fact that I think you’re incompetent, ladies and gentlemen, pay attention please: presenting the world’s longest “Shoosh”. Mmh…Shhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh. I’m goin’ echo and…stop. I’m not committing the way I normally do. When you go away, and regroup, maybe see you later.”

767

Tomek — Fri, 01 Aug 2008 18:51:51 +0000

“It really is just super that you’re here with us as a reminder that surgeons really are simply ignorant scalpel jocks. Hell, after surgery…if there’s the slightest medical issue you just turf the patient right down to us, the real doctors, so we can pick up your slack. You cut…and run, if you will. That’s right, it’s not just a phrase used by political pundits who wear bow ties. It is also the number one reason that all of you should pray to God, or, in your case Rex, Mocho the Samoan Bird King, that you never have to be treated by these flesh hungry butchers. Jenny, take his glasses as a trophy.”

766

Tomek — Fri, 01 Aug 2008 18:49:09 +0000

“Good morning, “reasons why I drink”, you may have noticed that we have a new face in our group.”

765

Tomek — Fri, 01 Aug 2008 18:47:20 +0000

“Any other day I’d say no, but today I’m gonna go ahead and just say no.”

764

Tomek — Fri, 01 Aug 2008 18:46:44 +0000

“Kelso lies selfishly and indiscriminately; you, you gotta draw your own line. This is half an Ibuprofen, it’s just the perfect dose for your pea-size brain, take it after I leave, you’ll save yourself the embarassment.”

763

Tomek — Fri, 01 Aug 2008 18:45:38 +0000

“Ok, in here we have Mrs. Frank, who is in renal-failure, a–and over here we have Dr. TurtleHead, who is suffering from a severe case of…”the Sulkys”. Symptoms include bad posture, moppy face and a sudden uncontrollable flailing of the upper extremities. Is it possible I’ve misdiagnosed this modality? (…) There it is. That a boy! Beat it. All of ya! (…)”

762

Tomek — Fri, 01 Aug 2008 18:42:29 +0000

“Sorry about that, Bobo,but I’m gonna go and tell the truth whenever i damn will, please. For instance, your tie. It’s hideous, in fact its only redeeming quality is to divert attention from the very visible outline of…your man-girdle.”

761

Tomek — Fri, 01 Aug 2008 18:41:19 +0000

“Noobie’s test result came back. He’s got Vasovagal Syncope. (…)If he’s vigorously Valsalva he can activate his reflex and actually lose consciousness. Carla…he’d pass out when he pooes!”

760

Tomek — Fri, 01 Aug 2008 18:38:31 +0000

“Jordan…the boy already lipsinks into your tampons, must we put a final nail in this tiny gay coffin?”