Category: Season 5

She didn’t come to the hospital for help. We bumped into her out here in the world. Don’t get me wrong. If a guy gets shot or if he has a heart attack and I am physically the closest doctor to him, I will intervene. Shy of that, you can’t. I mean, you just can’t. It’s too much to ask yourself. (…) Once you start blaming yourself for deaths that aren’t your fault, my friend, that’s a slippery slope you can’t come back from. I’ve seen it ruin a lot of good doctors, and I will not let it happen to you.

I can’t believe you think I’d do this with you. Are you insane? Seriously, I’m a doctor.

We’re also getting a good bit of interest from the seismologists at CalTech, who I understand will be able to chart the magnitude of the scream emanating from your hypnosis patient, as well as, of course, the numerous afterscreams that are sure to follow.

Totally worth it. I need one of you two clowns to do a work up on this guy. It’s going to be a giant pain in the ass.

All right, Lester, we’re having this out right here, right now! Oh, for the love of God! What’s this, some pansy get in touch with my feelings because my mommy didn’t love me” group?”

This right here is the get hit” line. Cross it at your own risk.”

Newbie, give me a little trouble? I’m having some help here.

My job is to make sick people better, not to help Bernie score a slice of Episcopalian tail on opening night.

You go do that. And I’ll go find God, quit drinking, get in touch with myself emotionally, and we’ll meet right back here at half past impossible. Mm’kay?

You know what else I hate about Kelso? His hair smells like a pet store.