Category: One Liners

Nobody talk, just drink.

Hey, don’t be embarrassed about staring at my ass. You’re only human, baby, and everybody does, anyway.

Oh, I don’t know. What do you say you start her on 20 CCs of It’s not my problem anymore!

Who do you mean, dashboard-face?

He’s done it! He’s done it! Dorian’s the Most! Annoying! Man in the World!

This is the dumbest conversation.

Oh sure, sure as long as you cut back on your vegetables. And maybe, you know, buy some clothes from this decade.

Everyone, we can all relax now — the planets have been realigned and order shall be returned to the people.

All right, Clara, you can go ahead and order yourself a Cosmopolitan; we’ll just grab a cab home.

One hundred free booger suckers – and you’ll say nothing.