396
Oh, stop it. Why would I steal your moment? Except for maybe because payback is a bitch.
Category: Season 4396Oh, stop it. Why would I steal your moment? Except for maybe because payback is a bitch. 417Each and every one of you is going to kill a patient. At some point during your residency you will screw up, they will die, and it will be burned into your conscience forever. Hell, take pee-pants, here – he just might go ahead and get himself a good clean kill this morning, seeing as his patient, Mrs. Samson, is in DKA and he hasn’t been tracking her phosphate level. Her phosphate level. Her phosphate level. 437Hey, Newbie? Just in case you didn’t actually notice, I have been covering all your patients, answering all your pages, and doing pretty much everything shy of picking up your sundress from the drycleaners. 485it’s a long story involving my son, a rum cake, and a low counter. Suffice to say that it turns out at first it’s, it’s endearing to watch them bounce off of the walls. But, man, you take your eyes off ’em for one second and – BAM! – they got a bucket on their head and they’re plowing right through your brand new flat screen TV. God save me, it was barely out of the box. The point is that Newbie is my drunk baby. 563Terrence doesn’t follow him around the shop all day telling him just exactly what color is in” this season or showing all of the other employees that he is not in fact the boss of his own life. You see, the woman is everywhere! She’s there when I work out in the morning, when I work out in the car on the way to work, and when I work out when I get to work. I can’t seem to get away from her. And that used to be fine when she just came around for five minutes every month or so to feed on my dignity, but now, I’d honestly kill myself, Bob, if I wasn’t convinced that Jordan wouldn’t already be there waiting for me in the afterlife. You see, typical of her, she went ahead and signed us up for an eternal tandem bike-ride all along the banks of the River Styx.” 397Well, I figure with her being ridiculously book-smart to the point where she has almost no interpersonal skills, and you being warm and cuddly as an un-potty trained labradoodle – and about as useful in high-stress medical situations as an un-potty trained labradoodle -together the two of you make one barely passable doctor…slash labradoodle. 418That young man has killed so many patients, I’m starting to think he just might be a government operative. The point is, the harder you study, the longer you just might be able to hold off that first kill. Other than that, I guess cross your fingers and hope that the guy you murder is a jackass with no family. Great to see you kids. All the best! (more…) |
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